Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Contact

I have watched and rewatched this movie and am constantly impressed with ow it circles the trials of my life so perfectly.

It helped me to see clearly what I shoulddo and what to rely on. It was a beautiful way to present theidea that I had been learning abot how belief is much stronger than science, but for the first time, I was able to not focus on the injustice of it all, or the reasons Ellie gives for seeking truth. I aske, well why is this theway it is done?

I have always had questions but never just one that over powered my life to theextent that hers did hr, it was why shewas selec.ted to make contact. I am a constant mess of science vs, what I feel. re wtching the movie was just the thing to me. I was impressed ow she said,"It's so beautiful, hey shouldve sent a poet, no words can describe" She obviously felt at a loss to convey. I understand that loss. There are many things that I fell and wuld like to say, but do not know how, the words aren't known to me.

I think that right now being Brandall's wife is the hardest thing, so I must turn it into astrength, so that I cannot stumble so again. By being constant Like Ellie was it will open other doors. For various reasons I know that God is aware and wants me to choose this path, even though it doesn't make sense and cannot be explained to others, yet, I must be constant despite whatever kind of struggle will face me. I can expect miracles if it is the right thing to do and there will always be away for me to do it.

Last week awoman spoke of loosing her spouse to death and her struggle to fel as she thought. That is my trouble and why my words can misrepresent me. I understand better than I feel. I know many things, but wait to feel them. I think this is the case with Brandall. I kno that I love him, but I do't feel anything from him, nor hae I ever, but that is not my fault, when a man ditches you when you are extremely sickmt is not to be taken li.htly, but I do take it such

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