Brandall, what?

Yes, I have a lot of Brandall related thoughts, sorry.

My children were just visiting me, how nice, huh? Brandall wrote me a horrible messsage in which he was very mean. but Ironically Peter Pan had sent me a vase of Flowers for Valentines day.

Today I had two thoughts.
I asked Lena what she would do, Move to Nashville or Utah, She said Nashville wiithout waiting today, but then I asked her why, she said that I belong with Daddy. He has a ring just like mine for when we got married. But she wanted me to take her to see Utah. Then I told her that Dddy didn't like me though, whih really should even be a concern of hers. So she explained simply, to get a new house and ask daddy if he wants to come and he doesn't hate me he will come. Brilliant child! anyway, I got to thinking, well, techincally there is more to a marriage tham living together. Charlote's web Wilbur said, "I think there is more to being friends than just living in the same place." So, I need to figure out what is more important beng in love or making my children happy, why can't they be the same thing?

I watched a movie about Joseph Smith, and was impressed that he felt the same way about the Gospel as I do about men, there's got to be an answer for me there. I thought to take what was good from everyone to mae the idea of the man I was looking for then I'd know when I met him, instead of trying to convince myself to be happy with whomever I choose. Cause even while Brandall was giving me computer parts, they weren't his in the first place and I bet it wasn't even his idea to give them to me.
I thought, but Utah Boy really loves computers just like me, and he would be perfect for me. Still I tend to give Brandall the benefit of the doubt because He has oenly acused me of being over analytical, so maybe I ought to take things at face value, he is supposedly simple and dumb, anyway, maybe I am looking too deeply for reasons. Maybe he just really does love me. though I see no reason for it. I know that God previously on every account has remained constant in telling me that Brandall is the one for me, enter my strangest idea of all time, referred to as "My seceret" in my poetry. I think I would fall in love completely with others like Peter Pan, which would be determental to my purpose. I am just being given what I ask for after all. It wasn't expected that I would need to fall in love yet, plus, there are plenty of songs, stories, examples that teach about failure in love before finding the right one, and again, with everything else I have done, it is becommming popular to get divorced and idolized as courageous, or something equally stupid, in an attempt to make what is good for one person, good for the cookie-cutter of all people.

I just figured out that I am perfect the way I am, and the best advice that I ever got was that I would be attracted to many others desirious of qualities they posesed yet it would not be the whole. once again, I think that is alot like the Gospel. I need to study that out to find my answer.