ok, I thought of a great way to spend my thoughts, but do not think it is really great unless entertainment is my goal. Enlightening? not so much.
Ok, here comes your assignment:
What will happen after death? and why do you suppose that?
I just think that they probably won't have computers or social media websites so I'd better practice actually communicating with people. I better remember how to add and subtract, too. Oh, If our bodies are burried does that mean we won't have them? I'll get hungry.
Will we even be able to tell much of a difference? Oh yeah, no screaming babies... but where do I get that?
Anyway, this ought to give you lots to think about that you may not otherwise, and it will likely have consequence.
Thursday, November 8, 2012
Monday, November 5, 2012
I don't have to think about this right now
My biggest deception has been the lie I have constantly told myself, in hopes of prtecting myself. The very thing I placed as a wall has become something else And what it has effectively done hass kept me from getting any help.
It was illustrated best in a stargate Atlantis episode where Dr. McKay puts on a shield using his newly aquired "ancient" DNA. Everyone thinks it is so cool and they all covet this device thinking how wonderful it would be to be invincible, but, it also threatens to kill him because among the things whiich cannot cross the barrier is sustainance. Now, I could go an entirely different direction with this thought because it was funny to me that the only thing he actually tried to digest was coffee, which perhaps the ancients saw as harmful and were protecting him. It's a whole lot like iRobot where the machines do nothing but exactly what they were intended to do "protect humans" the touble is that so many have different ideas about what this entails.
See? my next thought, which I'll save for later was about how difficult parenting is because we get married to someone we are attracted to with no thought about who they are or how they will go abut raising the "ideal child".
Ok, this circles back to my original unconcluded thought. I did not marry because I was attracted to someone, it was more or less because I was programed to do such. Afterall, "It's not good to be alone."
My greatest deception which requires much analizing is that I have been telling myself that my situation is somehow unique and unlike any other so that makes me an exception, not the rule itself, placing myself in new territory.
No one has ecxperienced what I have (which technically is true for anyone) and no one else has the solution that I desperately need (which is the lie). But, I aready explained that I do not have the time to ponder on that right now. Infact, I have used all of my time typing this...
It was illustrated best in a stargate Atlantis episode where Dr. McKay puts on a shield using his newly aquired "ancient" DNA. Everyone thinks it is so cool and they all covet this device thinking how wonderful it would be to be invincible, but, it also threatens to kill him because among the things whiich cannot cross the barrier is sustainance. Now, I could go an entirely different direction with this thought because it was funny to me that the only thing he actually tried to digest was coffee, which perhaps the ancients saw as harmful and were protecting him. It's a whole lot like iRobot where the machines do nothing but exactly what they were intended to do "protect humans" the touble is that so many have different ideas about what this entails.
See? my next thought, which I'll save for later was about how difficult parenting is because we get married to someone we are attracted to with no thought about who they are or how they will go abut raising the "ideal child".
Ok, this circles back to my original unconcluded thought. I did not marry because I was attracted to someone, it was more or less because I was programed to do such. Afterall, "It's not good to be alone."
My greatest deception which requires much analizing is that I have been telling myself that my situation is somehow unique and unlike any other so that makes me an exception, not the rule itself, placing myself in new territory.
No one has ecxperienced what I have (which technically is true for anyone) and no one else has the solution that I desperately need (which is the lie). But, I aready explained that I do not have the time to ponder on that right now. Infact, I have used all of my time typing this...
Friday, November 2, 2012
blank
what was AnneFrank's diary's name?
I really need a name to write to, it would feel less insane to be telling someone these things with an occasional onlooker. Plus, it would feel more honest and sincere because my tone changes alot from what was intended by the simple thought of who is my audience.
my thoughts ought to focus on a fitting name. This reminds me of a little child who after being told that he is too old for imaginary friend wonders why we pray to someone we cannot see.
I cannot see you, though it makes little difference to me. Vision is a pretty undervalued sense for me.
Dear so and so,
Your way of life wasn't wrong, it was your approach. Untill you see things differently they will not be any different.
I really need a name to write to, it would feel less insane to be telling someone these things with an occasional onlooker. Plus, it would feel more honest and sincere because my tone changes alot from what was intended by the simple thought of who is my audience.
my thoughts ought to focus on a fitting name. This reminds me of a little child who after being told that he is too old for imaginary friend wonders why we pray to someone we cannot see.
I cannot see you, though it makes little difference to me. Vision is a pretty undervalued sense for me.
Dear so and so,
Your way of life wasn't wrong, it was your approach. Untill you see things differently they will not be any different.
What if...
My brother, Jeremy used to say "wahf?" all of the time which in translated to mean "what if" I think Gavin might give him a run for his money on that one though. "Mom? what if it stated raining lava on us right now?" I suppose we would die. Dare I wonder why he asked?
Gavin says, "Hahn!" all of the time, it means "Hold on", but I was thinking a what if of my own, not strange contractions though that is what came out when I started typing.
My question is "What if people knew what I was really thinking?" I have to think about how to lead others to believe that I am even really about what I pretend to be about. To me, that is what relationships are about, seriously only one person knows the things I really think, and even they don"t really know the whole of it. But, there is a peace that comes from being able to have honest communication with another.
I was always a bit of a lone wolf through school because I figured that no one would really comprehend what I'm talking about anyway, so why waste my time. So, then I married a Mormon thinking that I would be able to speak in my own vernacular and be understood, but he was a recent convert and didn't have as firm grasp on things, so then I met Nicholas who was one of those "Utah m
Mormons all of his life" and I figured that he would "get me." Well, he's got me, but doesn't really come close to communicating with me.
But, you know what? I do not think I get myself most of the time, either. If someone else understood me they would have to translate back so that I could understand. For instance, I found a code I had written in another language. It was then ciphered into hex, etc. I vaguely recall thinking something and then thinking that it should not be written down, so it was recorded in some strange language that was then translated two additional times.
Well, with time I am much stupider. I just don't get it. I often read things or remember things that I said that I haven't even figured out yet, or am just now "getting it". So much for "things get better with age." I suppose that would work if I were cheese or wine or something.
So what if someone actually understood what I was thinking? Well, my smart witted answer is, "then I wouldn't have to tell them."
Gavin says, "Hahn!" all of the time, it means "Hold on", but I was thinking a what if of my own, not strange contractions though that is what came out when I started typing.
My question is "What if people knew what I was really thinking?" I have to think about how to lead others to believe that I am even really about what I pretend to be about. To me, that is what relationships are about, seriously only one person knows the things I really think, and even they don"t really know the whole of it. But, there is a peace that comes from being able to have honest communication with another.
I was always a bit of a lone wolf through school because I figured that no one would really comprehend what I'm talking about anyway, so why waste my time. So, then I married a Mormon thinking that I would be able to speak in my own vernacular and be understood, but he was a recent convert and didn't have as firm grasp on things, so then I met Nicholas who was one of those "Utah m
Mormons all of his life" and I figured that he would "get me." Well, he's got me, but doesn't really come close to communicating with me.
But, you know what? I do not think I get myself most of the time, either. If someone else understood me they would have to translate back so that I could understand. For instance, I found a code I had written in another language. It was then ciphered into hex, etc. I vaguely recall thinking something and then thinking that it should not be written down, so it was recorded in some strange language that was then translated two additional times.
Well, with time I am much stupider. I just don't get it. I often read things or remember things that I said that I haven't even figured out yet, or am just now "getting it". So much for "things get better with age." I suppose that would work if I were cheese or wine or something.
So what if someone actually understood what I was thinking? Well, my smart witted answer is, "then I wouldn't have to tell them."
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