Mary Anne cries all of the time and I am always reprimanding her explaining that crying is not fling anything at all to help. I was veto.g so hard because I miss my babies, and I imagined being told the same thing.
Previously, I could reason myself out of despair because of such scriptural accounts of women who left their children to decide their own fates after teaching them how to live, like Moses (his birth mother) and Samuel (Hannah). And I am.sure there are more but two were enough to establish an acceptable pattern. I could confidently accept, without tears, my fate that my stewardship could be fulfilled without consigning myself to an eternal life of misery. Besides, these were God's children, only in my temporary care anyhow. I did not just want an eternal COMPANION but needed one suited and aimed purposefully at the goal of an eternal world of children.
But, honestly, my tears were not erased by this thought. I loved each child dearly and had come to love them and feel attached to the point of needing them. I would sacrifice for them. The thought that wiped away my tears was that all of us are God's children, and surely he loves each of us as fully... "God loved us so He sent his Son..." And he had to risk loosing more of us, but He made that choice although he could have chosen Lucifer's plan and been able to know that we all would be saved. Instead, he lost for sure 1/3 of his dear children. How terribly sorrowful for Him that must be!!! But. Crying about it will not help, ".. how doest thou shed thy tears as rain upon the mountains? And Lord, how is it that thou canst weep?" I was both blessed and comforted by this inspired insight.
Previously, I could reason myself out of despair because of such scriptural accounts of women who left their children to decide their own fates after teaching them how to live, like Moses (his birth mother) and Samuel (Hannah). And I am.sure there are more but two were enough to establish an acceptable pattern. I could confidently accept, without tears, my fate that my stewardship could be fulfilled without consigning myself to an eternal life of misery. Besides, these were God's children, only in my temporary care anyhow. I did not just want an eternal COMPANION but needed one suited and aimed purposefully at the goal of an eternal world of children.
But, honestly, my tears were not erased by this thought. I loved each child dearly and had come to love them and feel attached to the point of needing them. I would sacrifice for them. The thought that wiped away my tears was that all of us are God's children, and surely he loves each of us as fully... "God loved us so He sent his Son..." And he had to risk loosing more of us, but He made that choice although he could have chosen Lucifer's plan and been able to know that we all would be saved. Instead, he lost for sure 1/3 of his dear children. How terribly sorrowful for Him that must be!!! But. Crying about it will not help, ".. how doest thou shed thy tears as rain upon the mountains? And Lord, how is it that thou canst weep?" I was both blessed and comforted by this inspired insight.
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