So much opposition

I feel like I may have been wrong in assuming opposition was decided to not work on me, so a new technique of flattery was used. But, I see now clearly the opposition to a thing I want makes me want it more cause that suggests it comes from a gut reaction of anger, that could not be masked for a deceptive purpose. It is like a reaction. My choice is one that it is unexpected and it meets so much opposition that I think of a screwtape desperately wringing his hands screaming, "pull out the stops! This is important." It is not a calculated thing, it is desperation.

Anyhow, it only makes,me more determined to go against what is opposed to what I know is good in the first place.