morning thought!

I started thinking, maybe I simply did not fast long enough, and could still get those sought after benefits. Instantly, I thought about how I truly believe that I was created and placed in this world to enjoy and use food, and I finally started to feel better and got sleep. I do not think it was worth it to fast, but, my mental abilities simply do not know. This was a Moses on Sinai moment where I was not going to be tempted because I could contrast the fruit of following one way as far superior to the other, so instantly, feeling like a bit was lost and regarding my fast to trip me up...well, that wasn'tgoing to work anymore. Now, my very thoughts were used and I began playing a game in my mind, an actual fun game, but I had deleted all my mobile games recognizing them as stumbling blocks, so despite my desire to play, I freaked out realizing my own thoughts were thwarting my desires to repent and improve. I long have had a goal to pray before anything else, but always think to do it right after I start my daily "fitness" routine, but because of this attempt to cause me to stumble  I was able to broaden my view and realize what was going on and instead say a prayer.

 I saw a video where a woman started each day with a sincere prayer and it was instantly impressed upon my mind what a great instrument she must be in God's hands, so that is what I prayed for this morning. I recognized that the struggle I had been enduring for years between my heart and mind had been nothing less that the struggle between the good and the profane. I realized and was able to turn back in the right direction, and it may have been a stumble and a set back, but knowing I am eternal it really matters where I am headed, not how far I am.