Its a wonderful life

Ok, this is a thought ot felt short, maybe too uninvolved to be a blog post, but clearly too long for a status update.

I was feeling really ugly. And the solution came, unexpectedly, "It's a Wonderful Life" style. First, was compliments, a make over and anything a person would want to feel pretty, but it did nothing. And if at all it made me worse knowing that I had nothing to  blame for being so hideous, but myself, most people would be gorgeous with a bit of time and attention. Then, I messed all of that up and looked worse, and got fatter, all I longed for was to be myself again.

This morning, I am no more beautiful than I ever was, but somehow it was enough. I did not need to be improved or look as good as anyone else. It was great just to look like myself, I like me.

Um, update, cause I do not think I ever explained what any of it has to do with "It's A Wonderful Life". In the movie, George Bailey, the hero discovers his terrible life by previous standards was actually wonderful by other views. When the honest prayers of others were answered an heavenly angel gave him his saving perspective, by allowing him to see the worth of his life as if he never was, which is what was seen as the thing that defined his existence at first. He honestly felt it would be better to not exist by those standards, but when he saw the value of his life from the perspective of those he had effected or even saved. The ripples of that choice were profound. I realized how beautiful I was not by getting what I want, but loosing what I had. Now, is it clear?